








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 489 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3517 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4288 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3317 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2252 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3151 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $664,250 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 664 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halen | 94% | 31 |
| #2 | Grizz | 84% | 38 |
| #3 | doltn^v^ | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | flixxy^-^💞 | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | eutopia | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Grizz | 84% | 38 |
| #3 | doltn^v^ | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | flixxy^-^💞 | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | eutopia | 52% | 33 |
| #6 | spud | 51% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizz | 10 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | eutopia | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | flixxy^-^💞 | 4 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | spud | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Halen | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizz | 243 | 0.33 | 6 min |
| #2 | spud | 184 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | flixxy^-^💞 | 89 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | eutopia | 75 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | doltn^v^ | 58 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizz | +4.21 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | Halen | +4.06 | 83 | 52 |
| #3 | spud | +2.73 | 89 | 74 |
| #4 | arcade | +2.27 | 79 | 73 |
| #5 | flixxy^-^💞 | +0.94 | 75 | 69 |





