








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 405 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1749 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,864 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4214 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4730 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3293 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3627 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $648,405 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 321 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ヅP_Avril★ | 60% | 62 |
| #2 | mooN | 54% | 37 |
| #3 | Polako | 53% | 141 |
| #4 | C8 | 50% | 334 |
| #5 | Polar | 44% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Mugiwara | 43% | 65 |
| #8 | Nephilins | Régulos | 39% | 59 |
| #9 | M4CK3 | 39% | 83 |
| #10 | Ogre | 38% | 84 |
| #11 | Ursinho carinhoso | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nandin | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Ogre | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | C8 | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | M4CK3 | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Mugiwara | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C8 | 317 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | Nandin | 91 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #3 | Polako | 68 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | M4CK3 | 63 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | ヅP_Avril★ | 55 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mooN | +3.86 | 77 | 67 |
| #2 | C8 | +1.66 | 70 | 72 |
| #3 | iscø | +0.80 | 67 | 69 |
| #4 | Mugiwara | +0.66 | 54 | 59 |
| #5 | Polako | +0.09 | 54 | 54 |





