








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
421 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,678 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 562 | 21% |
| Smokes | 521 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 933 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 662 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $122,378 of utility $55 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Polako | 45% | 31 |
| #2 | iscø | 38% | 84 |
| #3 | C8 | 38% | 92 |
| #4 | Nandin | 37% | 41 |
| #5 | mooN | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Polar | 33% | 6 |
| #8 | Ursinho carinhoso | 27% | 15 |
| #9 | ヅP_Avril★ | 25% | 8 |
| #10 | M4CK3 | 19% | 27 |
| #11 | Nephilins | Régulos | 18% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C8 | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | iscø | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Nandin | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Polako | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | Nephilins | Régulos | 2 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iscø | 282 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #2 | C8 | 217 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | M4CK3 | 115 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #4 | Nandin | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Nephilins | Régulos | 47 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mooN | +5.23 | 85 | 61 |
| #2 | C8 | +4.32 | 70 | 73 |
| #3 | Polako | +2.87 | 51 | 62 |
| #4 | iscø | +2.79 | 65 | 74 |
| #5 | Mugiwara | +2.10 | 59 | 58 |





