








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 18 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 82 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
801 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,199 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 520 | 24% |
| Smokes | 535 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 499 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 645 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $268,426 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wiiam | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | shaundw | 80% | 10 |
| #3 | Zerpherr | 75% | 8 |
| #4 | Kaybee =) | 73% | 22 |
| #5 | 'KM' | 72% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | N8 | 57% | 46 |
| #12 | yonkerzz | 56% | 36 |
| #13 | Nir | 50% | 24 |
| #14 | lemowel | 33% | 6 |
| #15 | EL FABIOLO | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'KM' | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jackmon- | 190 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | Kaybee =) | 114 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #3 | yonkerzz | 103 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nir | 84 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | N8 | 76 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'KM' | +2.95 | 86 | 76 |
| #2 | churley | +1.28 | 83 | 55 |
| #3 | N8 | +1.22 | 89 | 55 |
| #4 | Jackmon- | +0.88 | 82 | 75 |
| #5 | Nir | +0.85 | 82 | 72 |





