








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 497 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 878 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,324 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8976 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5876 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4487 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 7985 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,638,015 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 638 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adrian 240kg | 57% | 51 |
| #2 | Tob | 53% | 167 |
| #3 | iCantStop | 51% | 143 |
| #4 | William | 51% | 197 |
| #5 | Carina | 48% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Carina | 48% | 64 |
| #6 | 🅱️evin | 48% | 81 |
| #7 | ǝʞᴉǝH | 47% | 171 |
| #8 | Knekt kibbz | 46% | 71 |
| #9 | eXcma | 42% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ǝʞᴉǝH | 19 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | William | 13 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Knekt kibbz | 11 | 0.0073 |
| #4 | Adrian 240kg | 8 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | iCantStop | 6 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ǝʞᴉǝH | 768 | 0.21 | 18 min |
| #2 | Tob | 375 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | William | 322 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | iCantStop | 265 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | Knekt kibbz | 228 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knekt kibbz | +2.30 | 85 | 39 |
| #2 | Adrian 240kg | +1.71 | 81 | 50 |
| #3 | marius | +1.25 | 82 | 56 |
| #4 | ǝʞᴉǝH | +0.30 | 77 | 61 |
| #5 | eXcma | +0.27 | 79 | 66 |





