








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 151 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 287 matches | ||
| Faceit | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4730 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,671 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5225 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2627 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 4144 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2675 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,359,299 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 74 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NastyGulag fighter Kermit2 | 53% | 115 |
| #2 | ✪ tez1fyy | 52% | 85 |
| #3 | Petrophagus | 51% | 126 |
| #4 | Bas | 51% | 340 |
| #5 | Bacca | 50% | 349 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Bas | 51% | 340 |
| #5 | Bacca | 50% | 349 |
| #6 | Josh | 48% | 381 |
| #7 | PiXXoN | 44% | 162 |
| #8 | DaskeMann | 37% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bacca | 27 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Bas | 14 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Josh | 11 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | ✪ tez1fyy | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | Petrophagus | 5 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bacca | 1944 | 0.26 | 49 min |
| #2 | Bas | 1865 | 0.26 | 50 min |
| #3 | Josh | 561 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #4 | PiXXoN | 383 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #5 | ✪ tez1fyy | 283 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bacca | +2.31 | 72 | 69 |
| #2 | Bas | +1.50 | 78 | 73 |
| #3 | ✪ tez1fyy | +1.22 | 79 | 58 |
| #4 | Rubirian | -0.18 | 64 | 58 |
| #5 | Josh | -1.47 | 66 | 45 |





