








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 430 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 110 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2428 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,101 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 540 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1139 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1469 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 953 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $669,306 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | valardos | 68% | 25 |
| #2 | Browar | 57% | 40 |
| #3 | smoly | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | FapinHo *oknamojegotaty.pl|NO4M | 56% | 77 |
| #5 | Plaplit | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAZI lft | 9 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | FapinHo *oknamojegotaty.pl|NO4M | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Browar | 5 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | ProSosenka PvPro.com | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | dvsky | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FapinHo *oknamojegotaty.pl|NO4M | 249 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | KAZI lft | 236 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | dvsky | 114 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #4 | ProSosenka PvPro.com | 113 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Pr0feska | 55 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EuraS ☠ | +1.28 | 88 | 47 |
| #2 | KAZI lft | +1.16 | 81 | 54 |
| #3 | Plaplit | +0.68 | 70 | 65 |
| #4 | Pr0feska | +0.37 | 58 | 41 |
| #5 | Browar | +0.31 | 85 | 56 |





