








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 162 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 186 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2415 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,890 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1127 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1862 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 803 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1098 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $600,670 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 791 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gully | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | Cloudy | 71% | 24 |
| #3 | Fazeyyy | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | KOKKIES | 64% | 25 |
| #5 | ♕ MadCap ♕ | 61% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Fazeyyy | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | KOKKIES | 64% | 25 |
| #5 | ♕ MadCap ♕ | 61% | 104 |
| #6 | Naughty Noo-Noo | 56% | 36 |
| #7 | YMKlouiB | 55% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕ MadCap ♕ | 29 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | Cloudy | 9 | 0.0198 |
| #3 | KOKKIES | 8 | 0.0147 |
| #4 | YMKlouiB | 7 | 0.0141 |
| #5 | Naughty Noo-Noo | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕ MadCap ♕ | 353 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #2 | Naughty Noo-Noo | 143 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | YMKlouiB | 101 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #4 | KOKKIES | 95 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Gully | 93 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloudy | +3.60 | 75 | 56 |
| #2 | Corrupt | +2.77 | 78 | 51 |
| #3 | YMKlouiB | +2.17 | 74 | 68 |
| #4 | KOKKIES | +1.15 | 75 | 61 |
| #5 | Gully | +0.73 | 77 | 55 |





