








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1001 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 264 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




108 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11768 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 42,316 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12121 | 29% |
| Smokes | 8018 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 11160 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 11017 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,604,946 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7389 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bustxd | 68% | 182 |
| #2 | CheezMonkey | 67% | 72 |
| #3 | Pencil | 66% | 61 |
| #4 | ! Stean | 57% | 152 |
| #5 | Amyzing | 56% | 181 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Anithe✯ | 52% | 75 |
| #11 | GiGGleS | 51% | 148 |
| #12 | CkPwn | 51% | 108 |
| #13 | LT.FURY | 51% | 150 |
| #14 | HeavyD | 50% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ! Wan | 50 | 0.0111 |
| #2 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 29 | 0.0111 |
| #3 | ! Stean | 26 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | CkPwn | 23 | 0.0102 |
| #5 | ✪I.Love.Boob$™ | 22 | 0.0128 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ! Wan | 1474 | 0.33 | 44 min |
| #2 | ! Stean | 1048 | 0.34 | 28 min |
| #3 | Bustxd | 692 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #4 | Punchy bag | 418 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #5 | CkPwn | 370 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | +4.59 | 92 | 60 |
| #2 | ! Wan | +2.79 | 87 | 76 |
| #3 | Bustxd | +2.34 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | CheezMonkey | +2.33 | 85 | 31 |
| #5 | Gully | +2.26 | 74 | 59 |





