








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 964 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 114 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




174 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,168 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5895 | 48% |
| Smokes | 2158 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2373 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1742 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $918,542 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 500 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Comte Tab DeWesh | 57% | 68 |
| #2 | Vosgrone | 49% | 143 |
| #3 | N'GOLO | 48% | 33 |
| #4 | SamuelTv | 47% | 89 |
| #5 | tu fumes pas tout les soirs | 46% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Révérang Karter | 91 | 0.0336 |
| #2 | tu fumes pas tout les soirs | 83 | 0.0240 |
| #3 | Antwo | 82 | 0.0234 |
| #4 | Vosgrone | 27 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | Comte Tab DeWesh | 26 | 0.0184 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vosgrone | 840 | 0.29 | 14 min |
| #2 | tu fumes pas tout les soirs | 426 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Révérang Karter | 328 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | BabarKool | 217 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | KoolMan__ | 217 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Comte Tab DeWesh | +4.47 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | Révérang Karter | +4.22 | 87 | 39 |
| #3 | Sam gratlékouilles | +1.18 | 80 | 46 |
| #4 | SamuelTv | +0.63 | 52 | 48 |
| #5 | Vosgrone | +0.21 | 57 | 52 |





