








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 644 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4497 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,353 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1130 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1247 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1110 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 866 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $383,001 of utility $54 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 744 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banana Man | 50% | 158 |
| #2 | ddd | 48% | 191 |
| #3 | Gargameltavion III | 47% | 180 |
| #4 | mAYO❤ | 42% | 180 |
| #5 | Jokuntro | 42% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Gargameltavion III | 47% | 180 |
| #4 | mAYO❤ | 42% | 180 |
| #5 | Jokuntro | 42% | 62 |
| #6 | runice | 36% | 42 |
| #7 | Egato202 | 23% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mAYO❤ | 43 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | Banana Man | 40 | 0.0125 |
| #3 | Gargameltavion III | 38 | 0.0103 |
| #4 | ddd | 34 | 0.0088 |
| #5 | runice | 10 | 0.0124 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ddd | 670 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #2 | mAYO❤ | 404 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Gargameltavion III | 342 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | Banana Man | 216 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #5 | Jokuntro | 76 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yunk | +4.86 | 82 | 37 |
| #2 | Gargameltavion III | -0.01 | 47 | 43 |
| #3 | ddd | -1.42 | 53 | 51 |
| #4 | Banana Man | -1.70 | 51 | 38 |
| #5 | Jokuntro | -2.12 | 49 | 46 |





