








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 538 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,430 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3498 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4358 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4023 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1551 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $716,076 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1149 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yunk | 42% | 180 |
| #2 | Gargameltavion III | 39% | 175 |
| #3 | Banana Man | 38% | 162 |
| #4 | BoofLordNord | 38% | 29 |
| #5 | Jokuntro | 37% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | BoofLordNord | 38% | 29 |
| #5 | Jokuntro | 37% | 75 |
| #6 | ddd | 37% | 149 |
| #7 | runice | 32% | 25 |
| #8 | Egato202 | 29% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gargameltavion III | 41 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | yunk | 37 | 0.0101 |
| #3 | Banana Man | 37 | 0.0111 |
| #4 | ddd | 32 | 0.0105 |
| #5 | runice | 5 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ddd | 582 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | Gargameltavion III | 408 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | Banana Man | 214 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | yunk | 163 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | BoofLordNord | 134 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yunk | +5.40 | 82 | 32 |
| #2 | BoofLordNord | +2.10 | 60 | 46 |
| #3 | Gargameltavion III | +1.09 | 48 | 49 |
| #4 | Banana Man | -1.07 | 53 | 36 |
| #5 | Jokuntro | -1.57 | 54 | 47 |





