








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1123 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 632 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 116 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,888 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12733 | 35% |
| Smokes | 9361 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9915 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3879 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,251,408 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 940 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sven | 54% | 270 |
| #2 | Cubegamer | 49% | 380 |
| #3 | Schamaiga Fieling | 48% | 266 |
| #4 | LegendaryWombat | 48% | 87 |
| #5 | Schmosby | 48% | 412 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | LegendaryWombat | 48% | 87 |
| #5 | Schmosby | 48% | 412 |
| #6 | ObiSwagKenobi | 47% | 362 |
| #7 | Im Al1na | 46% | 438 |
| #8 | Freistaat Franken | 46% | 382 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schmosby | 61 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Cubegamer | 25 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Im Al1na | 22 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Freistaat Franken | 20 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Schamaiga Fieling | 20 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Im Al1na | 1230 | 0.14 | 31 min |
| #2 | Schamaiga Fieling | 1051 | 0.19 | 31 min |
| #3 | Cubegamer | 990 | 0.12 | 41 min |
| #4 | ObiSwagKenobi | 978 | 0.13 | 24 min |
| #5 | Sven | 911 | 0.17 | 23 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sven | +2.73 | 83 | 64 |
| #2 | Schamaiga Fieling | +1.57 | 74 | 78 |
| #3 | ✪commanderLandbier | +0.56 | 71 | 69 |
| #4 | LegendaryWombat | +0.46 | 75 | 74 |
| #5 | ObiSwagKenobi | +0.43 | 54 | 65 |





