








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 497 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 264 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7151 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,025 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6389 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5245 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4507 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3884 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,323,965 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Cubegamer | 52% | 196 |
| #7 | Im Al1na | 52% | 221 |
| #8 | Schmosby | 52% | 201 |
| #9 | Schamaiga Fieling | 51% | 98 |
| #10 | LegendaryWombat | 51% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schmosby | 38 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | Cubegamer | 15 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | ✪commanderLandbier | 12 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | ObiSwagKenobi | 12 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Schamaiga Fieling | 11 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪commanderLandbier | 625 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | Im Al1na | 613 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #3 | Cubegamer | 504 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #4 | ObiSwagKenobi | 462 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #5 | Schamaiga Fieling | 362 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sven | +2.67 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | nanaki | +2.39 | 81 | 69 |
| #3 | Schamaiga Fieling | +1.70 | 76 | 77 |
| #4 | LegendaryWombat | +0.37 | 70 | 72 |
| #5 | ✪commanderLandbier | +0.25 | 71 | 68 |





