








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 914 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 483 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 99 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7422 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,076 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9916 | 28% |
| Smokes | 9157 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8589 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 7414 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,095,971 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 733 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | GumGum | 48% | 69 |
| #7 | Schamaiga Fieling | 48% | 268 |
| #8 | ✪commanderLandbier | 46% | 438 |
| #9 | Freistaat Franken | 46% | 265 |
| #10 | LegendaryWombat | 44% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schmosby | 86 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | Cubegamer | 28 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | ObiSwagKenobi | 26 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Freistaat Franken | 19 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | ✪commanderLandbier | 18 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schamaiga Fieling | 1158 | 0.20 | 36 min |
| #2 | ✪commanderLandbier | 1099 | 0.12 | 29 min |
| #3 | ObiSwagKenobi | 1028 | 0.13 | 25 min |
| #4 | Cubegamer | 919 | 0.12 | 36 min |
| #5 | Sven | 732 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sven | +1.95 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | Schamaiga Fieling | +1.53 | 72 | 79 |
| #3 | ✪commanderLandbier | +0.86 | 70 | 70 |
| #4 | ObiSwagKenobi | +0.59 | 54 | 66 |
| #5 | LegendaryWombat | +0.38 | 68 | 76 |





