








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 218 matches | ||
| Faceit | 166 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5016 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,900 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5381 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3993 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4456 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4070 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,541,800 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 617 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slabzologi | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | Shocker | 58% | 93 |
| #3 | MrRedsea | 52% | 291 |
| #4 | Selatius | 51% | 63 |
| #5 | Lil Th1nk3r_ | 48% | 174 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | -=Grandiosa=- | 45% | 125 |
| #10 | UNCLE YODA | 45% | 38 |
| #11 | namtaB | 43% | 96 |
| #12 | SHINING. | 42% | 60 |
| #13 | Marshall | 41% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrRedsea | 38 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | Hårekdenhardbalne | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Lil Th1nk3r_ | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Marshall | 7 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | SHINING. | 6 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrRedsea | 1131 | 0.19 | 36 min |
| #2 | Lil Th1nk3r_ | 596 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #3 | Hårekdenhardbalne | 351 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | Marshall | 254 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #5 | -=Grandiosa=- | 100 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shocker | +3.70 | 87 | 45 |
| #2 | Marshall | +2.27 | 64 | 80 |
| #3 | Zewkaz | +2.26 | 77 | 75 |
| #4 | MrRedsea | +0.82 | 61 | 77 |
| #5 | Slabzologi | -0.01 | 88 | 55 |





