








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 578 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 263 matches | ||
| Faceit | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 97 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4541 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,806 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5433 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4366 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4781 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3226 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,237,465 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 750 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slabzologi | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | Shocker | 55% | 127 |
| #3 | Lil Th1nk3r_ | 54% | 197 |
| #4 | namtaB | 52% | 122 |
| #5 | Zewkaz | 52% | 291 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Selatius | 49% | 77 |
| #9 | SHINING. | 49% | 61 |
| #10 | Angel | 48% | 31 |
| #11 | Hårekdenhardbalne | 48% | 220 |
| #12 | Becks | 47% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zewkaz | 31 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Lil Th1nk3r_ | 13 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Hårekdenhardbalne | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Shocker | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | namtaB | 7 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zewkaz | 1228 | 0.20 | 42 min |
| #2 | Lil Th1nk3r_ | 708 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #3 | Hårekdenhardbalne | 373 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #4 | [EXD] La0uD | 188 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | Becks | 177 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shocker | +3.67 | 85 | 46 |
| #2 | Zewkaz | +2.20 | 76 | 77 |
| #3 | MrRedsea | +1.39 | 65 | 77 |
| #4 | Slabzologi | -0.12 | 89 | 54 |
| #5 | [EXD] La0uD | -0.30 | 67 | 74 |





