








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Faceit | 67 matches | ||
| Wingman | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3232 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,578 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1294 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1422 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1046 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1816 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $519,903 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 273 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grinmore | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | Snooks | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | slimmote | 53% | 74 |
| #4 | we officially bussin | 49% | 67 |
| #5 | Hybr13 | 45% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Hybr13 | 45% | 143 |
| #6 | Agent K77 | 45% | 100 |
| #7 | 6Foot6Mafia | 43% | 69 |
| #8 | ButteredNipples | 33% | 36 |
| #9 | EggzTheSecond | NotFound.Tech | 32% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hybr13 | 10 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Agent K77 | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | we officially bussin | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | slimmote | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | 6Foot6Mafia | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hybr13 | 583 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #2 | Agent K77 | 282 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | 6Foot6Mafia | 280 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | we officially bussin | 207 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | slimmote | 123 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grinmore | +2.86 | 77 | 65 |
| #2 | Snooks | +2.19 | 72 | 67 |
| #3 | we officially bussin | +1.63 | 78 | 57 |
| #4 | Agent K77 | +1.38 | 81 | 58 |
| #5 | slimmote | +1.30 | 73 | 63 |





