








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 226 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 451 matches | ||
| Faceit | 254 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7480 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,225 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9849 | 35% |
| Smokes | 7489 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4043 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 6844 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,123,202 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 842 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skadewdle | 67% | 48 |
| #2 | Grinmore | 55% | 93 |
| #3 | 6Foot6Mafia | 52% | 185 |
| #4 | Agent K77 | 52% | 251 |
| #5 | we officially bussin | 49% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Agent K77 | 52% | 251 |
| #5 | we officially bussin | 49% | 166 |
| #6 | TheOneAnd0nly™ | 45% | 143 |
| #7 | slimmote | 44% | 144 |
| #8 | ButteredNipples | 41% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Agent K77 | 20 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | we officially bussin | 16 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | TheOneAnd0nly™ | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | 6Foot6Mafia | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | slimmote | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 6Foot6Mafia | 807 | 0.20 | 22 min |
| #2 | Agent K77 | 762 | 0.14 | 21 min |
| #3 | we officially bussin | 507 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | Grinmore | 301 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #5 | slimmote | 235 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skadewdle | +5.27 | 89 | 64 |
| #2 | Agent K77 | +1.87 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | Grinmore | +1.85 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | we officially bussin | +1.39 | 75 | 55 |
| #5 | 6Foot6Mafia | +0.65 | 64 | 73 |





