








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 36 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2023 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,291 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1584 | 30% |
| Smokes | 999 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1574 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1134 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $917,047 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 272 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ dr0p | 74% | 35 |
| #2 | StoneyParnell | 69% | 45 |
| #3 | Drippy Cat | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | Tubbers | 61% | 57 |
| #5 | kennyS | 56% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Tubbers | 61% | 57 |
| #5 | kennyS | 56% | 133 |
| #6 | Reckless | 55% | 151 |
| #7 | ShittyBoyz | 47% | 15 |
| #8 | Zachariaz | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reckless | 23 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | kennyS | 12 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | ✪ dr0p | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Tubbers | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Drippy Cat | 2 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reckless | 403 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | kennyS | 184 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | ✪ dr0p | 107 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | Tubbers | 99 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Zachariaz | 47 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ dr0p | +7.41 | 89 | 61 |
| #2 | Reckless | +5.53 | 86 | 54 |
| #3 | FaLcon | +0.70 | 73 | 47 |
| #4 | ShittyBoyz | +0.11 | 77 | 73 |
| #5 | kennyS | -0.49 | 43 | 54 |





