








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 251 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2843 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,590 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 390 | 25% |
| Smokes | 534 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 280 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 386 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $32,958 of utility $4 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raikiri | 73% | 22 |
| #2 | gregs | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | kingdra | 55% | 69 |
| #4 | Smooth | 53% | 45 |
| #5 | Kang | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Udder Spinner | 46% | 147 |
| #8 | Bad Dong | 45% | 29 |
| #9 | ✪ F3DerAL | 44% | 87 |
| #10 | oKoL | 44% | 278 |
| #11 | KJL | 33% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oKoL | 32 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | gwill | 26 | 0.0113 |
| #3 | Udder Spinner | 25 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Smooth | 5 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | kingdra | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kingdra | 437 | 0.30 | 13 min |
| #2 | ✪ F3DerAL | 416 | 0.24 | 12 min |
| #3 | oKoL | 359 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #4 | Udder Spinner | 279 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #5 | Smooth | 149 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oKoL | +2.10 | 88 | 40 |
| #2 | Kang | +1.26 | 75 | 67 |
| #3 | gregs | +0.97 | 66 | 71 |
| #4 | Raikiri | +0.91 | 77 | 37 |
| #5 | gwill | +0.66 | 71 | 29 |





