








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1418 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 392 matches | ||
| Faceit | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9382 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,201 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5624 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5396 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2808 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 4373 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,467,869 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1524 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Indy | 70% | 44 |
| #2 | Ben. | 64% | 113 |
| #3 | | 53% | 78 |
| #4 | Slurm | 51% | 55 |
| #5 | Bot Ollu | 50% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | | 53% | 78 |
| #4 | Slurm | 51% | 55 |
| #5 | Bot Ollu | 50% | 70 |
| #6 | Daiki Aomine | 48% | 42 |
| #7 | Arctiz | 39% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ben. | 15 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Bot Ollu | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Daiki Aomine | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Slurm | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | | 412 | 0.26 | 11 min |
| #2 | Ben. | 391 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #3 | Slurm | 237 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | Daiki Aomine | 211 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #5 | Bot Ollu | 193 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LimeGrab | +2.46 | 91 | 54 |
| #2 | Ben. | +1.57 | 82 | 51 |
| #3 | Bot Ollu | +1.48 | 84 | 45 |
| #4 | Indy | +1.04 | 92 | 52 |
| #5 | | +0.44 | 78 | 69 |





