








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 351 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Anubis | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1630 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,347 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2308 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1648 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2634 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1757 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $334,546 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪︎ bladeofmatrix シ | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | XIO* | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Schlumpfdonald | 55% | 71 |
| #4 | IDoMethDaily | 52% | 73 |
| #5 | rayk* | 51% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IDoMethDaily | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | MindCorrosion | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | rayk* | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | bobby | 2 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rayk* | 176 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | IDoMethDaily | 133 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Schlumpfdonald | 68 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | MindCorrosion | 63 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | bobby | 32 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rayk* | +1.12 | 73 | 70 |
| #2 | IDoMethDaily | +0.87 | 63 | 54 |
| #3 | bobby | +0.79 | 67 | 66 |
| #4 | ✪︎ bladeofmatrix シ | +0.78 | 54 | 69 |
| #5 | grandpaCheechi .つ༽◕_◕ ༽つ. | -0.23 | 74 | 77 |





