








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 735 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 309 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Renown | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6031 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,719 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6182 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5648 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5502 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5387 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $941,498 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 372 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | QuiTschE | 45% | 247 |
| #8 | Schlumpfdonald | 42% | 60 |
| #9 | Hybed | 41% | 34 |
| #10 | Blyatin | 40% | 133 |
| #11 | ✪︎ bladeofmatrix シ | 38% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CrimsenArthalos | 522 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #2 | QuiTschE | 285 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | Blyatin | 285 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | M'sB|Cartman | 270 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #5 | payback | 212 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CrimsenArthalos | +1.51 | 57 | 65 |
| #2 | bobby | +1.29 | 74 | 71 |
| #3 | ✪︎ bladeofmatrix シ | +0.65 | 58 | 75 |
| #4 | Hybed | +0.44 | 54 | 70 |
| #5 | payback | -0.20 | 63 | 67 |





