










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
594 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,239 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 769 | 34% |
| Smokes | 515 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 435 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 520 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $165,981 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 214 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AlekS | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | papierjongen | 100% | 4 |
| #3 | corn | 100% | 6 |
| #4 | Noccturnal♡ | 78% | 9 |
| #5 | flixxy^-^💞 | 75% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tony | 8 | 0.0122 |
| #2 | CrePoW™:) | 5 | 0.0299 |
| #3 | stizza | 5 | 0.0562 |
| #4 | V1nson | 2 | 0.0093 |
| #5 | Noccturnal♡ | 2 | 0.0114 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voilà | +8.44 | 90 | 69 |
| #2 | AlekS | +6.17 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | ʻO Noa ke aliʻi | +5.66 | 98 | 48 |
| #4 | flixxy^-^💞 | +3.53 | 86 | 51 |
| #5 | CrePoW™:) | +3.37 | 87 | 85 |





