








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 217 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2487 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,430 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1715 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2356 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1561 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1798 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,012,596 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | William Joseph Blazkowicz II | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | tuve | 57% | 106 |
| #3 | Hinuriseta | 53% | 161 |
| #4 | JaSol | 53% | 144 |
| #5 | Linkka | 52% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | tuve | 57% | 106 |
| #3 | Hinuriseta | 53% | 161 |
| #4 | JaSol | 53% | 144 |
| #5 | Linkka | 52% | 134 |
| #6 | Jare | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hinuriseta | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | tuve | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Linkka | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | JaSol | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Jare | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hinuriseta | 1143 | 0.33 | 29 min |
| #2 | JaSol | 910 | 0.30 | 24 min |
| #3 | tuve | 370 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #4 | Linkka | 342 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #5 | Jare | 69 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hinuriseta | +4.33 | 80 | 73 |
| #2 | William Joseph Blazkowicz II | +0.67 | 61 | 53 |
| #3 | tuve | +0.56 | 62 | 71 |
| #4 | Linkka | -0.28 | 54 | 64 |
| #5 | JoSo | -0.65 | 48 | 51 |





