








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 194 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 96 matches | ||
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1722 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 711 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1060 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1125 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1501 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $702,605 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 179 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sarcoptic | 54% | 54 |
| #2 | KritsAGC | 51% | 171 |
| #3 | walterâ„¢ | 51% | 176 |
| #4 | pierre. | 51% | 128 |
| #5 | oiseau | 50% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | KritsAGC | 51% | 171 |
| #3 | walterâ„¢ | 51% | 176 |
| #4 | pierre. | 51% | 128 |
| #5 | oiseau | 50% | 54 |
| #6 | OkaySavage | 43% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pierre. | 22 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | KritsAGC | 18 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | walterâ„¢ | 16 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | OkaySavage | 9 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | Sarcoptic | 4 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | walterâ„¢ | 436 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | KritsAGC | 242 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | oiseau | 164 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | pierre. | 153 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | OkaySavage | 134 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KritsAGC | +2.52 | 81 | 61 |
| #2 | oiseau | +0.56 | 84 | 69 |
| #3 | pierre. | +0.11 | 76 | 60 |
| #4 | Artistootle | -0.51 | 72 | 50 |
| #5 | walterâ„¢ | -0.60 | 59 | 62 |





