








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 240 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




104 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4038 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,621 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3308 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3246 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2488 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2579 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $687,220 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 227 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GommeHD | 24 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | Schbubi | 17 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | mL | 10 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | BaumiBaumann 2.0 | 9 | 0.0143 |
| #5 | Tonk | 6 | 0.0053 |





