








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 728 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 514 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,206 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6503 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5232 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3120 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 5351 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,878,174 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 162 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | staNNN | 78% | 50 |
| #2 | ASH | 76% | 140 |
| #3 | cHa0s - | 75% | 53 |
| #4 | j1 | 75% | 230 |
| #5 | Bruh. | 75% | 315 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Bruh. | 75% | 315 |
| #6 | brokenpegs | 74% | 269 |
| #7 | ⭕⃤ blood_thirsty | 73% | 390 |
| #8 | WaTeR | 73% | 348 |
| #9 | ROCKitsme | 61% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WaTeR | 71 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | Bruh. | 21 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | j1 | 21 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | brokenpegs | 16 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | ASH | 9 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⭕⃤ blood_thirsty | 1939 | 0.24 | 53 min |
| #2 | WaTeR | 1626 | 0.24 | 43 min |
| #3 | brokenpegs | 1421 | 0.27 | 39 min |
| #4 | Bruh. | 1151 | 0.19 | 28 min |
| #5 | ASH | 457 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cHa0s - | +3.10 | 73 | 76 |
| #2 | Bruh. | +2.08 | 74 | 64 |
| #3 | 911 | +1.83 | 66 | 70 |
| #4 | brokenpegs | +1.42 | 75 | 73 |
| #5 | j1 | +0.94 | 81 | 50 |





