








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 440 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1779 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,474 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 846 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1378 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1147 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1103 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $451,643 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cHii$ma | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | wagwan | 67% | 39 |
| #3 | Lapatti | 61% | 133 |
| #4 | Smuli_Yöpyöriset | 59% | 49 |
| #5 | nipa:D | 58% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | nipa:D | 58% | 88 |
| #6 | autism terminal | 56% | 25 |
| #7 | MUSTA JORI | 50% | 28 |
| #8 | Wallheck | 49% | 37 |
| #9 | reima | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lapatti | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | nipa:D | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lapatti | 469 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | nipa:D | 180 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | Smuli_Yöpyöriset | 104 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | autism terminal | 72 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Wallheck | 63 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuhnu | +1.62 | 84 | 54 |
| #2 | reima | +1.25 | 84 | 65 |
| #3 | autism terminal | +1.17 | 92 | 56 |
| #4 | nipa:D | +0.62 | 69 | 73 |
| #5 | Wallheck | +0.36 | 79 | 57 |





