








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 444 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3871 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3327 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2344 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3420 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3763 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,207,335 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 279 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N1ps | 63% | 38 |
| #2 | cryptic | 58% | 83 |
| #3 | Mike Nolan | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | Alex | 55% | 29 |
| #5 | bop | 53% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KTL Ash | 13 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | cryptic | 11 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | hutch | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | ChampagneChicken | 7 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | bop | 6 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bop | +4.22 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | ChampagneChicken | +4.10 | 68 | 55 |
| #3 | hutch | +3.31 | 72 | 71 |
| #4 | N1ps | +3.18 | 80 | 70 |
| #5 | Alex | +1.17 | 78 | 58 |





