








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1318 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 215 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9340 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,908 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9069 | 32% |
| Smokes | 8459 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4568 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 5812 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,047,791 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | 66% | 65 |
| #2 | N1ps | 65% | 125 |
| #3 | hutch | 60% | 353 |
| #4 | Tripwana | 60% | 94 |
| #5 | cryptic | 56% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | cryptic | 56% | 105 |
| #6 | czop | 55% | 83 |
| #7 | ♤key | 53% | 86 |
| #8 | KTL Ash | 50% | 117 |
| #9 | Alex | 45% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 28 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | KTL Ash | 26 | 0.0110 |
| #3 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | 12 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | Alex | 12 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | cryptic | 10 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 1129 | 0.16 | 31 min |
| #2 | KTL Ash | 493 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #3 | cryptic | 373 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | N1ps | 295 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #5 | Tripwana | 236 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bop | +3.21 | 83 | 67 |
| #2 | N1ps | +3.12 | 83 | 70 |
| #3 | hutch | +2.44 | 71 | 70 |
| #4 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | +0.88 | 74 | 55 |
| #5 | cryptic | +0.11 | 74 | 52 |





