








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 528 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 133 matches | ||
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




81 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5589 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,758 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7278 | 43% |
| Smokes | 3203 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3387 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2890 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,670,050 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 518 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N1ps | 64% | 113 |
| #2 | Alex | 59% | 82 |
| #3 | hutch | 58% | 321 |
| #4 | ♤key | 58% | 83 |
| #5 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | 57% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | 57% | 90 |
| #6 | byte | 56% | 48 |
| #7 | bop | 56% | 105 |
| #8 | czop | 52% | 134 |
| #9 | KTL Ash | 51% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 35 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | KTL Ash | 14 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | Alex | 12 | 0.0072 |
| #4 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | 10 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | N1ps | 9 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 972 | 0.15 | 26 min |
| #2 | bop | 513 | 0.25 | 12 min |
| #3 | Alex | 357 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #4 | KTL Ash | 319 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | ♤key | 201 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N1ps | +3.58 | 85 | 69 |
| #2 | hutch | +3.22 | 74 | 69 |
| #3 | bop | +3.03 | 85 | 61 |
| #4 | byte | +1.56 | 84 | 62 |
| #5 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | +1.07 | 72 | 55 |





