








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 94 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2410 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1618 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1680 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1520 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1406 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,274 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | JvLM | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | orCheese | 48% | 115 |
| #5 | TherlBread | 47% | 101 |
| #6 | infrnL | 44% | 68 |
| #7 | BEAST | 43% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | orCheese | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | TherlBread | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | BEAST | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | cem | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | JvLM | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | orCheese | 424 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | TherlBread | 362 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #3 | infrnL | 328 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #4 | cem | 197 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #5 | BEAST | 141 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HtR | +1.57 | 76 | 53 |
| #2 | JvLM | +1.02 | 89 | 65 |
| #3 | cem | +0.69 | 71 | 63 |
| #4 | BEAST | +0.48 | 67 | 64 |
| #5 | TherlBread | +0.32 | 64 | 79 |





