








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 225 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3024 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3808 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2799 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1224 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 2758 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $637,362 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jääkarhupurkka | 79% | 19 |
| #2 | Teuv0 | 68% | 19 |
| #3 | LaatuRipuli | 65% | 20 |
| #4 | cs_pera | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | awis | 52% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Art0♚ | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Unijoni | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Kkammos | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | maketin | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | awis | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | janki | 487 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | awis | 450 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | Kkammos | 417 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #4 | Paske | 396 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #5 | Unijoni | 299 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LaatuRipuli | +5.86 | 85 | 69 |
| #2 | jääkarhupurkka | +3.50 | 76 | 70 |
| #3 | awis | +2.39 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | cs_pera | +2.20 | 75 | 68 |
| #5 | Teuv0 | +2.10 | 77 | 73 |





