








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 151 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2030 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,840 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2200 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1821 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2359 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2460 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $450,652 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 97 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dom | 53% | 101 |
| #2 | BOBBY "AXE" AXELROD | 50% | 34 |
| #3 | dRe | 50% | 126 |
| #4 | PitrU_PunisheR | 49% | 53 |
| #5 | Lahaine | 48% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | dRe | 50% | 126 |
| #4 | PitrU_PunisheR | 49% | 53 |
| #5 | Lahaine | 48% | 104 |
| #6 | select | 48% | 130 |
| #7 | Menty | 47% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | select | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | dRe | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Dom | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | PitrU_PunisheR | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Menty | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | select | 729 | 0.26 | 20 min |
| #2 | dRe | 505 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #3 | Menty | 440 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #4 | Lahaine | 244 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | Dom | 207 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Martin | +1.38 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | Menty | +0.41 | 68 | 75 |
| #3 | Lahaine | +0.40 | 76 | 77 |
| #4 | dRe | -0.15 | 71 | 76 |
| #5 | select | -0.38 | 53 | 79 |





