








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 38 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
879 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,256 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 617 | 27% |
| Smokes | 691 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 450 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 498 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $282,086 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wa1zted | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | b1 | 54% | 13 |
| #3 | sk0gstad | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | h3nr1kko | 53% | 32 |
| #5 | Kr1se | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asta | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | wa1zted | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | h3nr1kko | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wa1zted | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | h3nr1kko | 83 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | Asta | 74 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | ✪TriKx | 53 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | JonnE | 52 | 0.38 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kr1se | +3.03 | 85 | 56 |
| #2 | b1 | +2.25 | 78 | 64 |
| #3 | ✪TriKx | +1.58 | 91 | 70 |
| #4 | wa1zted | +1.40 | 78 | 54 |
| #5 | h3nr1kko | +0.43 | 74 | 66 |





