








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 822 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 111 matches | ||
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3578 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,600 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2708 | 28% |
| Smokes | 693 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 3655 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 2544 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,631,550 of utility $237 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeanBean | 81% | 37 |
| #2 | ⚡MiLK♡TøA☁🗲Vita🗲 | 80% | 64 |
| #3 | 錦鋰大鑊喇! | 78% | 23 |
| #4 | Happy伯 | 78% | 82 |
| #5 | m0nasi | 74% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | みどり | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Happy伯 | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | m0nasi | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | KXNelson | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | ⚡MiLK♡TøA☁🗲Vita🗲 | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KXNelson | 794 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #2 | ⚡MiLK♡TøA☁🗲Vita🗲 | 409 | 0.34 | 9 min |
| #3 | みどり | 315 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #4 | Happy伯 | 168 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | roro | 156 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KXNelson | +4.92 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | Happy伯 | +4.55 | 88 | 63 |
| #3 | 大家好我是木头头 | +2.33 | 60 | 65 |
| #4 | roro | +2.30 | 83 | 64 |
| #5 | みどり | +1.68 | 83 | 64 |





