








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1683 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 483 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 77 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8318 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,606 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7364 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5933 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5981 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5328 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,082,774 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 618 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | specterSRB | 67% | 45 |
| #2 | Nasuada auf Dancepad | 59% | 58 |
| #3 | Kired | 57% | 49 |
| #4 | Nightmare. | 57% | 51 |
| #5 | chrob_ | 57% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Deagleberg | 47% | 275 |
| #11 | ForceONE | 46% | 196 |
| #12 | Rickey | 46% | 184 |
| #13 | jbl | 44% | 362 |
| #14 | Pikomantis⛴ | 38% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deagleberg | 18 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | jbl | 11 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | ♛rEDDAEX♛ | 9 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Dav1d | 9 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | ForceONE | 7 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jbl | 1301 | 0.17 | 32 min |
| #2 | Rickey | 859 | 0.23 | 23 min |
| #3 | ForceONE | 691 | 0.16 | 22 min |
| #4 | Deagleberg | 645 | 0.11 | 19 min |
| #5 | Pikomantis⛴ | 287 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nightmare. | +2.41 | 77 | 65 |
| #2 | ✪ WirasAnsaa | +2.40 | 81 | 75 |
| #3 | specterSRB | +0.71 | 82 | 46 |
| #4 | Rickey | +0.45 | 71 | 65 |
| #5 | Kired | +0.11 | 59 | 67 |





