








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1738 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 806 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 62 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8933 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,802 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6790 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6387 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 8643 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 3982 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,920,764 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 491 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dav1d | 57% | 158 |
| #2 | Rickey | 52% | 256 |
| #3 | ♛rEDDAEX♛ | 50% | 390 |
| #4 | jbl | 49% | 677 |
| #5 | ✪ WirasAnsaa | 47% | 275 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ♛rEDDAEX♛ | 50% | 390 |
| #4 | jbl | 49% | 677 |
| #5 | ✪ WirasAnsaa | 47% | 275 |
| #6 | ForceONE | 46% | 272 |
| #7 | Pikomantis⛴ | 46% | 177 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛rEDDAEX♛ | 24 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | jbl | 19 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | ForceONE | 18 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | ✪ WirasAnsaa | 15 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Dav1d | 11 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jbl | 2280 | 0.16 | 59 min |
| #2 | Rickey | 1454 | 0.27 | 40 min |
| #3 | ForceONE | 1165 | 0.20 | 39 min |
| #4 | ✪ WirasAnsaa | 979 | 0.17 | 32 min |
| #5 | Dav1d | 565 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ WirasAnsaa | +2.90 | 81 | 76 |
| #2 | Rickey | +1.28 | 74 | 63 |
| #3 | Deagleberg | +0.19 | 72 | 62 |
| #4 | ForceONE | -0.16 | 51 | 76 |
| #5 | Pikomantis⛴ | -0.31 | 69 | 72 |





