








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1263 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 169 matches | ||
| Faceit | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4860 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,491 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3958 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4032 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3474 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4027 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,235,116 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 491 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡Boni♡ | 80% | 69 |
| #2 | Oatz | 75% | 65 |
| #3 | Aluminum | 75% | 32 |
| #4 | Sanzh1k33 | 75% | 51 |
| #5 | peewee | 73% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grimblee | 20 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Oatz | 12 | 0.0092 |
| #3 | Sippin Juice 4 Lyfe | 9 | 0.0115 |
| #4 | ♡Boni♡ | 7 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | RubB :}- | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grimblee | 427 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #2 | RubB :}- | 336 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| #3 | ♡Boni♡ | 300 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | Static | 174 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Oatz | 153 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aelor | +3.50 | 88 | 63 |
| #2 | Yellow Flash | +2.08 | 94 | 61 |
| #3 | Grimblee | +1.99 | 90 | 71 |
| #4 | ♡Boni♡ | +1.97 | 84 | 54 |
| #5 | Static | +1.86 | 89 | 63 |





