








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 486 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 160 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3055 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,575 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3555 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3312 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2006 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2702 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $819,775 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 487 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aluminum | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | Oatz | 76% | 25 |
| #3 | Grimblee | 73% | 77 |
| #4 | Sippin Juice 4 Lyfe | 70% | 37 |
| #5 | aelor | 70% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡Boni♡ | 13 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | Grimblee | 12 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | Oatz | 10 | 0.0186 |
| #4 | peewee | 6 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | aelor | 4 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡Boni♡ | 303 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #2 | Sanzh1k33 | 291 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Grimblee | 290 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | aelor | 253 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #5 | Yellow Flash | 150 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aluminum | +2.08 | 88 | 68 |
| #2 | Grimblee | +2.07 | 89 | 70 |
| #3 | Yellow Flash | +1.73 | 92 | 62 |
| #4 | ♡Boni♡ | +1.49 | 81 | 54 |
| #5 | Sanzh1k33 | +1.47 | 88 | 59 |





