








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 762 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,993 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1284 | 32% |
| Smokes | 733 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1085 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 891 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $907,106 of utility $250 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 367 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Clover ❤❤ | 92% | 12 |
| #2 | kev | 83% | 12 |
| #3 | RubB :}- | 76% | 25 |
| #4 | aelor | 75% | 65 |
| #5 | Static | 74% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aelor | 260 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | Static | 252 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #3 | Grimblee | 200 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Sippin Juice 4 Lyfe | 162 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | ♡Boni♡ | 161 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Static | +3.36 | 92 | 60 |
| #2 | aelor | +2.70 | 89 | 67 |
| #3 | Grimblee | +1.78 | 87 | 69 |
| #4 | Clover ❤❤ | +1.75 | 74 | 68 |
| #5 | Aluminum | +1.59 | 88 | 67 |





