








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 567 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2391 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,503 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1041 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1264 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1592 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1606 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,056,428 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 235 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chubby Guerrero!!! | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | Apothysis | 55% | 51 |
| #3 | adamsmithbrno | 55% | 31 |
| #4 | Ryfm | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | FLACKO | 51% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T1mBa0 | 7 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | FLACKO | 6 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Linkan | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | retro_rp1 | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | zyzzfan123 | 3 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T1mBa0 | 532 | 0.33 | 14 min |
| #2 | retro_rp1 | 287 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | Apothysis | 138 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | adamsmithbrno | 127 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Ponken | 114 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Apothysis | +2.19 | 77 | 81 |
| #2 | Stinkvard | +1.30 | 61 | 50 |
| #3 | zyzzfan123 | +1.18 | 41 | 41 |
| #4 | adamsmithbrno | +0.42 | 72 | 76 |
| #5 | Ryfm | +0.36 | 76 | 50 |





