








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 342 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
923 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,629 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 747 | 21% |
| Smokes | 627 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1281 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 974 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $401,134 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rolando | 59% | 58 |
| #2 | zyzzfan123 | 54% | 76 |
| #3 | Stinkvard | 51% | 43 |
| #4 | Ryfm | 45% | 29 |
| #5 | SHYSAAN | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rolando | 59% | 58 |
| #2 | zyzzfan123 | 54% | 76 |
| #3 | Stinkvard | 51% | 43 |
| #4 | Ryfm | 45% | 29 |
| #5 | SHYSAAN | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stinkvard | 6 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | zyzzfan123 | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Ryfm | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rolando | 195 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Ryfm | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | SHYSAAN | 81 | 0.40 | 2 min |
| #4 | zyzzfan123 | 64 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Stinkvard | 64 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stinkvard | +3.13 | 65 | 57 |
| #2 | zyzzfan123 | +1.62 | 46 | 43 |
| #3 | Ryfm | +1.21 | 70 | 45 |
| #4 | SHYSAAN | +0.51 | 69 | 55 |
| #5 | FLACKO | -0.84 | 68 | 60 |





