










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 494 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 115 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2070 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,705 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1094 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1255 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1235 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1121 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $954,345 of utility $246 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 479 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yuuki | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | Kurisu | 58% | 65 |
| #3 | Saint | 58% | 153 |
| #4 | Yuno | 56% | 48 |
| #5 | sebzera | 53% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kurisu | 58% | 65 |
| #3 | Saint | 58% | 153 |
| #4 | Yuno | 56% | 48 |
| #5 | sebzera | 53% | 77 |
| #6 | Scaks | 53% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saint | 20 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Scaks | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Yuno | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | sebzera | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Kurisu | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saint | 592 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #2 | Scaks | 490 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #3 | sebzera | 271 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | Kurisu | 250 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #5 | Yuno | 121 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saint | +1.56 | 90 | 59 |
| #2 | sebzera | +1.01 | 68 | 59 |
| #3 | Yuno | +0.77 | 75 | 59 |
| #4 | Scaks | +0.20 | 52 | 66 |
| #5 | Kurisu | +0.13 | 66 | 54 |





