








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 211 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 138 matches | ||
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2623 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,428 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3586 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3339 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3976 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2527 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $964,399 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | makita ossi | 55% | 91 |
| #2 | Betsijumala | 49% | 37 |
| #3 | n4su | 48% | 159 |
| #4 | sÜkeripupu:3 | 47% | 55 |
| #5 | KAUPPIAS | 47% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | KAUPPIAS | 47% | 129 |
| #6 | KalakutanKorjaamo | 46% | 202 |
| #7 | REISKA57 | 45% | 103 |
| #8 | esva | 41% | 94 |
| #9 | creepcrab(\)(;,,;)(/) | 39% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KalakutanKorjaamo | 9 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | creepcrab(\)(;,,;)(/) | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | makita ossi | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | sÜkeripupu:3 | 6 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | n4su | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n4su | 739 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #2 | KalakutanKorjaamo | 685 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | creepcrab(\)(;,,;)(/) | 484 | 0.23 | 16 min |
| #4 | KAUPPIAS | 393 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #5 | makita ossi | 318 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | creepcrab(\)(;,,;)(/) | +3.33 | 52 | 79 |
| #2 | makita ossi | +2.85 | 50 | 66 |
| #3 | Betsijumala | +2.21 | 61 | 66 |
| #4 | KAUPPIAS | +0.74 | 55 | 71 |
| #5 | n4su | +0.01 | 49 | 63 |





