








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 645 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 470 matches | ||
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Renown | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9924 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,973 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2473 | 12% |
| Smokes | 4962 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5785 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 7753 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,176,162 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1750 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wankyy | 70% | 123 |
| #2 | Bad Gones | 60% | 60 |
| #3 | hayes | 56% | 119 |
| #4 | LiganFs | 55% | 129 |
| #5 | Lan0`k F/A | 55% | 169 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Smithy | 52% | 243 |
| #9 | JF- | 50% | 207 |
| #10 | AliBond | 50% | 40 |
| #11 | horizon | 50% | 72 |
| #12 | HenryG | 48% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smithy | 30 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | JF- | 16 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | alfie | 13 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Lan0`k F/A | 11 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | LiganFs | 7 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lan0`k F/A | 969 | 0.28 | 26 min |
| #2 | Smithy | 811 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #3 | alfie | 676 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #4 | wankyy | 608 | 0.24 | 18 min |
| #5 | LiganFs | 548 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lan0`k F/A | +2.07 | 92 | 76 |
| #2 | AliBond | +2.03 | 86 | 62 |
| #3 | Chouby | +1.67 | 79 | 50 |
| #4 | wankyy | +1.61 | 83 | 79 |
| #5 | LiganFs | +0.58 | 84 | 74 |





