








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 557 matches | ||
| Faceit | 227 matches | ||
| Esplay | 186 matches | 1,776 | |
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Renown | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 126 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7046 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 46,021 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10122 | 22% |
| Smokes | 13402 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 12246 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 10251 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,508,140 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stianhay9 | 65% | 55 |
| #2 | Fattey | 60% | 70 |
| #3 | ojen | 60% | 154 |
| #4 | xy | 59% | 220 |
| #5 | Bjydn | 56% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | WarThorn | 48% | 296 |
| #15 | voldy | 48% | 79 |
| #16 | (ɔıʇsɐqɯoᙠ)ɐɐɐɐɐɹO | 47% | 152 |
| #17 | somber | 46% | 97 |
| #18 | Adoon | 46% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brew | 14 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | Mantipanti | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | ojen | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Ole M | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Knekkern | 4 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knekkern | 1686 | 0.23 | 45 min |
| #2 | xy | 570 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #3 | brew | 549 | 0.03 | 15 min |
| #4 | Mantipanti | 371 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #5 | Ole M | 340 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ojen | +2.69 | 63 | 69 |
| #2 | Knekkern | +2.23 | 66 | 70 |
| #3 | Bjydn | +1.86 | 73 | 64 |
| #4 | s0ppen | +1.68 | 75 | 68 |
| #5 | Mantipanti | +1.41 | 82 | 67 |





