








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 181 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
670 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,091 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 411 | 13% |
| Smokes | 767 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1072 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 841 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $352,437 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | nexCor | 38% | 8 |
| #11 | WiLzU | 36% | 39 |
| #12 | jSu | 35% | 31 |
| #13 | Lusse69 | 29% | 7 |
| #14 | Taku007 | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | petsku | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Nebu | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Raimo Raivosuo | 1 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WiLzU | 136 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | jSu | 108 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | petsku | 105 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nebu | 96 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | nexCor | 66 | 0.40 | 1 min |





